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How many years of therapy do you think I'll have to pay for just because Riley got a weekly blog and Avery is getting much less?

I could try to make excuses, but I'm too lazy. (well, actually, that's one of them)

But, for now, there is no sibling jealousy. Riley has taken a liking to his "little sister named Avery," as he tends to address and describe her.

The lack of blogging really is Mother Nature's fault, though. Riley was born deeper into Spring and we could get out and do a lot more.

Avery's first few weeks were freezing. She was mostly stuck inside, staring at a plain, white (popcorn-free) ceiling, getting dolled up or blowing out diapers.

Riley coped with winter by doing normal, sane things, like sword fighting the TV.

and turning his stuffed George into Cajuns football player.

He also started to learn the responsibilities that come with living in a house with three very large oak trees. Responsibilities destined for a firstborn son.

Ok, I lie. Actually, he just stood in the back of the truck while I loaded 20+, 55 gallon bags of leaves to drive 50 feet to the front yard.

He did help a little with stick gathering and making a fire. Ya know, safety first.

And he was also a pretty good helper when we used my Jeep to rip a few crappy trees and stumps out of the ground.

But, meteorologically, things have started to change.

Avery and Joan have had a few visitors, as it seems that many people we went to high school with have bred in the last year.

First, she met up with two month old buds Austen (son of Beth and Jude) and Ryler (son of Laci and Chris, and star of Laci and Chris on the Go )

Their conversations were riveting.

A couple of weeks later she met up with four month old Maggie (daughter of Katie and Mike and star of A Baby is Brewing)

I think they plotted on how to find out all of the bad things, if any, Katie and I may have participated in when we shared an apartment in college. They're hoping to have a stack of Get Out of Jail Free cards for their teenage years.

As for outdoors, the new neighborhood is all dead ends, and very low traffic, so we get to go for lots of walks, weather permitting. These are great lessons for Riley who learned how hard it is to ride a bike with a sword and a hook hand.

Since she hasn't learned to talk yet, Avery has had no choice but to be dragged along for the things the rest of us like to do.

She made a trip to the Baton Rouge Zoo.

And combined her first Jeep ride and first trip to Johnson's into one giant ball of overstimulation.

But she missed out on a Lake Martin hike with Granny and Caroline and Paul.

(yes, the person pushing the double stroller through the grass is the same person who just had a broken ankle and broken elbow surgery, but she didn't complain. Oh, yeah, y'all don't know that story yet, 'cause I still owe a Disney World post.)

Unfortunately, it was still cool enough that the gators weren't active and we didn't see any until we spotted a tiny one just as we were walking through the gate to leave.

That made Riley's shirt even more appropriate.

No pics of this, but, along the way, Riley got to pee outdoors for the first time. He immediately exclaimed, "It's just like watering flowers!" He was a natural.

With this temporary winter temporarily respite, our Big Green Egg has been getting a multi-tasked work out.


First, it's been cooking lots of chicken.
Since Avery started to show signs of stomach trouble similar to what Riley had, Joan immediately cut out dairy and other common intolerance inducing food, again. Combine that with some Zantac, and things on the infant digestive front have calmed down considerably.


But the Egg was also charged with the more pleasant task of backyard marshmallow roasting.

and to wrap things up, here's a couple of kooky kid examples.

First, Riley has taken to calling anything he does an "exercise."

His most recent "exercise" is to stand on the rail of his bed and the arm rest of the adjacent chair, usually nude or in his underwear, post bath. At one point he dubbed it the Captain Hook Pirate Exercise Trick.

and I promise you, the only part of that I am responsible for is that he has any clothes on at all.

Not being happy with just balancing precariously a few feet off the ground, he then added the element of stomping his foot while singing "Step In Time." Behold Mary Poppins meets Cirque. (if you've got 90 seconds to spare)

I also made the (possible) mistake of letting him watch the You Tube video of Three Little Pigs by Green Jelly. Now he wants to watch it, or at least hear the song on my phone, all of the time.

He doesn't know all of the words, but he's getting a feel for the intro, and the overall vibe.

for reference here's the original (sorry, they disabled embed. Warning- claymation violence and the word a$$ uttered once.)

That's it for this week. I would promise to post more regularly, but I don't make promises I can't keep (unless I think I'm going to get something in return)

But stay tuned anyway. Please?

One Down

Last week you saw photos of a baby all covered in biological gunk. A baby we were surprised to see so soon.

This week you'll see a baby not covered in biological gunk and a baby we aren't surprised to see.

This will be a long one with lots of pictures (thats what she said?)

Part I-- The Incarceration

Before we brought Avery to the nursery we brought Riley in for our first family time. Pics of this meeting are sparse because she was also having her first meal, and this just isn't that kind of website (unless you sign up for the $29 monthly membership)

Then, as per protocol, we abandoned her in the nursery to be the subject of secret government experiment and to receive her security tag capable of putting the whole hospital on lockdown if you get too close to a stairwell or door.

Riley's first act as a big brother was to fuss at the nurses through the window for hurting his little sister. He was legitimately upset, which answers a burning question we had, yes he is human or at least capable of having human emotions.

In addition to having a mass of dark hair, Avery was also a few rhinestones and some yellow polish away from being a star cashier at WalMart. Her mommy fixed that real quick like.

and then they both got some sleep, which seems to be what WalMart cashiers are doing when we are forced to go there.

with her newly shorn fingernails she confirmed that she is Riley's sister and went straight for the thumb.

The rest of the stay was pretty uneventful. All of the nursery nurses and a few of the floor nurses were really good.

Surprisingly, there were only a couple of employees whose personalities and idiocy made me want to rip their heads off (and one of them was a supervisor).

After a couple of days cooped up in that small, drab room, we were paroled and made our way home.

But while we were there, Riley had his own doctor's visit, just to be safe. Our pediatrician, who we really like, told us that in the last month she had put 5 infants in the ICU with RSV that they got from older siblings. That's more kids than she had put into ICU in her 5 years of practice. You could see in her face that it was something that bothered her.

Because Riley had been snotty for a few days, she urged us to get him tested. Fortunately, he passed, and she was visibly relieved. She is either a great actor (doubtful) or she really cares about her patients (probable) and she definitely won us over even more just by showing that she cares.

That visit then led to a week of me having to play "Dr. Hubal" [sic] and let Riley listen to my "heartbeep" and check my eyes for eyelashes.

Part II- Homecoming Week

It was everything you remember about Homecoming Week, just without the cheerleaders, jocks, marching bands, pep rallies and awkward dances.

Avery has gotten progressively more eye opening, literally.

and her hair has demonstrated the insane ability to stay in a mohawk no matter what.

i had forgotten how many silly faces they involuntarily make, especially when sleeping. I was actually momentarily concerned a couple of days ago because her eyes were doing weird Stevie Wonder type movements. Then I realized she had just opened her eyes in her sleep. But that almost makes it more creepy.

Riley has taken to her pretty well, treating her just a couple of steps better than he does Jimmy.

He has rocked her.

and let her lay in his bed.

Held her hand for comfort through he first "bath"

and had sing-alongs while playing spastic movement peek-a-boo

He has only shown a little bit of jealousy toward Avery, but that manifested in the form of mimicry.

he got into a little fight with his cousin Caroline over whose baby it was, but, generally, he's been a pretty sweet kid about everything.

Most people seem to ask me, "Is she sleeping?"

To which i can only reply, " I don't know, but I am."

Despite what Ben Stiller said, there's not much I can do to take care of the baby's most basic need. But from my semi-well rested vantage point, it seems that everything is going well.

And we are less scared this time around and have started allowing occasional tummy sleep when she's having trouble.

Joan has posting privileges, so she may come on and tell the actual horror story of her current life as a 2x mother, but things are sunny behind my rose colored glasses.

Thats pretty much it for the organized thoughts, if that what you want to call what you've just read ( I mean skimmed over while looking at pictures.) Now here's some randomness.

I figure you can't be a truly obnoxious new parent unless you post a video of your kid sleeping.

But this one is actually kinda funny (to me) because it is a 4 day old snoring.

and Riley's musical "talents" have been steadily progressing. He's got the rage of a metal drummer, and the posture of an old blues man.

Here's his percussive interpretation of Mahna Mahna

and the same song jazzed out with his Nanny on the "bandstand", while hitting himself in the eye with his saxophone (easier than you might think)

for reference sake, here's what he thinks he's playing

While it is mildly fun to be doing this again, I can't guarantee weekly posting, so be sure to sign up on the right to receive emails when new posts go up.